Thursday, November 17, 2011

Hi, I'm Anna. I'm a Sugar Addict.

Confessions of a Sugarholic:

This last weekend, while in Charleston, there were just too many goodies.  And on the way out of town, we happened upon a sweet shop.


Isn't the courtyard dreamy?  Who could pass it up?  Not I.  So we stopped--just to look.


But then they had those cupcakes with sprinkles!  You know I'm a sucker for sprinkles.

I don't mean to be misleading.  I'd eaten about a sweet a day during the entire weekend.  Tuesday, I was really good.  Back on the wagon.  All day.  Not an ounce of sugar.  But then...

Mr. F. flew his new bird for the first time.  You must understand, he's been training for this new machine, and he's been attempting the flight since mid last week.  But every time there was maintenance required or bad weather or maintenance required.  So, he'd been anticipating this flight for a solid week.  And today he flew!  And everything went swimmingly!

So I baked a cake and gave him a card.  Just as a happy.  And it turned out fabulous!  

When he came home, he found the cake and said, "What's this?"

And I said, "Oreo Cake!  Because you are the best pilot around."

And he said, "But we can't have sugar."  {how awesome that he, in solidarity with me and Fünf, refuses sweets too.}

And I said, "But today's special.  You flew!  And you're home in one piece!"

And he said, "How do you find a way to make every day special?  And to you, special equals sugar."

Here, I just started crying.  Partly because I was sad we didn't get to eat the cake.  But also because I realized that when thinking of a way to create a little happy for Mr. F., I always think of sweets.  Perhaps because I rack my brain for the happiest small thing he could walk in the door to find, and I  would spin giddy over sweets.  So, I was crying because I couldn't get past what I wanted.  And therefore, I couldn't think of what he would want.  

ugh.

I tried to explain all that.  And he said the happiest thing he could find when he walked in the door was me.  I'm his happy.  what?  How am I so lucky.  

But the point is:  I need help--with the sugar thing and with thinking outside myself.  

The sugar thing:  I've decided to start a food journal.  Hopefully, this will keep me focused on 100 grams of protein and all the other true goodies, and not on the sugar goodies.  

The thinking outside myself thing:  ideas?  Other than the obvi.  Seriously.  When you want to treat someone or celebrate an achievement, what do you do?  I'd love to hear non-food ways to happiness.  


All that was yesterday.  Before bed, we had a piece of cake.  And Mr. F. took the rest with him to work today.    And I'm starting anew:  Protien-focused.  Vegi-focused.  Fruit-focused.  Fünf-loving.  And my antenna are up for the little things that make people around me happy.  

6 comments:

  1. You can send me the rest of the cake. That would make my day special. :)

    on the one hand I have to say Bad Mr. F! I would have cried too--one has to be gentle with the hormones of pregnant ladies! On the other hand I am extremely sympathetic to showing love in the proper 'language'. I'm a gift-giver and it stresses Anthony out when I am like "yay, I got you a present!" because he knows I spent time and money on something he really didn't need/want. So I'm working on that too.

    I also have to note that it is very frustrating how often food=reward. I cleaned the kitchen? I've earned fudge! I went and worked out? I win a trip to starbucks! This is definitely somethign I worry about for parenting too is to not make food or dessert a reward but for a (real!) special occasion and for it to be special because it someone's favorite or has unusual ingredients NOT because it's full of sugar or is fried.

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  2. Um, I feel really guilty saying this, but that cake looks awesome!!! But then, I'm sugar addicted, too. I need to work on that. Seriously. I've done it once before and it took some serious spiritual strength. Isn't that silly? But it did. You can do this! Like you said, it's all about focus and what you tell yourself. One of my favorites last time was, "No, that is *not* how I treat myself. Because being overweight is not a treat! Treating myself is eating yummy steamed broccoli because it's so good for me!" And it worked, with God's blessing. Now you're getting me all motivated...maybe I should do this with you!! Of course, today is the teacher luncheon at school and Thanksgiving parties tomorrow. :D

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  3. Morgan, yes! This reward thing... I do not want to leak into parenting. And I must say that Mr. F's tone was gentle, he was trying not to laugh actually. So, perhaps I misrepresented.

    Ashley, Next time someone has a birthday or you need to make a cake, you should use this recipe! It was SOOOO good.

    And I'm right there with you. It seems like there is always (especially this time of year) an easy excuse to have sugar. Lots of parties, lots of sweets. I suppose a great time of year to test my will power. :)

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  4. not to be crude....but most guys think of one thing in particular when they think of their 'happy'---- intimacy. :)

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  5. I know JUST where you're at. When I gave up sugar I was devastated for my lack of baking. To me, nothin' says lovin' like somethin' from the oven!!! So instead I learned to bake incredible bread (don't mind telling you) and make the meals extra special.

    And yes- sometimes a cake or cookies is totally appropriate!

    The thing is- I've discovered since we eat sweets soooo rarely now- it REALLY is an EXTRA special treat!

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  6. I love you Anna! I wish we lived closer so we could hang out, AND eat sweets together once the baby comes out. :) Love your blog!

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